The Comfort of Trauma-Informed Care
Editor’s Note: When you’ve been hurt by the very people who were supposed to love and protect you, it can be nearly impossible to trust anyone. It’s scary, and it takes time. That’s why trauma-training is so critical. In this third segment of stories and quotes from the community compiled by Community Director Sara Cardwell, you will catch a glimpse of the reach out/pull back dance between a woman coming to NAOMI and the support specialist waiting for her. Read part 1, “Alone in the Dark” and part 2, “The Importance of Being Truly Seen.”
I can feel myself hiding and starting to drown but I don’t know how to reach for help.
I am feeling things I haven’t experienced in a long time, and they are pulling me under. I try to tell myself to text her and let her know what is happening with me. But I just can’t make myself.
Why, why am I this way?
Why can’t I just take the lifeline and ask her to be with me in this pain?
Trying to reach out and take her grace is like standing on a tightrope getting ready to cross to the other side while being blinded by fog.
I can hear her voice on the other side looking for me, telling me she’s there, but I can’t see her and my thoughts tell me that if I try ... there will only be more pain.
Besides, what can she do, she can’t change anything about my situation or what I am going through.
Whenever she is with me, I just want her to help me fix it or give me the answers that I seek. She doesn’t though…ever….
Even when I ask her to……
Instead, there is a giving back of my circumstances. Encouragement to be still and name what I’m going through. Reassurance that I will find my way.
Listening to my core is overwhelming, and I don’t know what to do with everything I am becoming aware of.
Often, I need her presence to be with me while I’m sifting through all the pieces inside of me. Acknowledging myself is somehow more bearable when she is there.
This time when she calls…. I hold my breath and pick up the phone:
When I hear her voice, I suddenly remember a moment when we spent the afternoon walking and talking in the warm sun. I don’t know why, but this memory helps me to tell her what I am going through.
As always, she is there. Present. Listening. Seeing me. Seeking to understand.
And leading me back to myself.
When we’re done talking, things are still unclear, and the unknown is still overwhelming; but I am now more confident that I can keep moving forward.
Slowly and gently, I am learning about who I am and what I need to care for myself.
Come back next week for the final part in this series: From Surviving to Thriving. Or sign up below for our newsletter to receive monthly news on what healing from trauma looks like and how NAOMI is helping women keep moving forward in the process.
